How Much Time is Your Kid Spending on Social Media?

Screen Time and Tween’s/Teens Time
A Closer Look…

In six and a half hours, you can:

  • Drive from New York City to Virginia Beach, VA
  • Watch more than three feature-length films
  • Install carpet in the interior of a 900 square foot home
  • Read two 300 page paperback books

Or your average tween/teen can be glued to their phone or device for 6 and 1/2 hours every single day. And that’s not including doing any schoolwork or research.

6 ½ hours a day means that your tween/teen
 

  • Spends 45 ½ hours per week, more than the average full-time job, looking at a device
  • Is using 2,372 hours a year looking down and lost in a virtual world
  • Spends 98 days a year not interacting with humans in person
  • Experiences more than three months of missed opportunities

What are kids missing during those hours, days, weeks and months annually?

  • They aren’t building things, drawing, painting, dancing, running
  • They aren’t using their imagination
  • They are not exploring nature – getting dirty, finding bugs, seeing the beauty of a flower, smelling the air after a rain shower
  • They are not learning empathy and sympathy which occurs naturally when humans interact with one another
  • THEY ARE permanently altering their developing brains, which research indicates could have long-lasting consequences for our children

Your children are not

  • Developing strong social skills
  • Making small talk with other kids in a classroom
  • Active listening skills
  • Making eye contact and smiling at other people
  • The observational skills necessary to access and interpret their environment

It’s shocking when the reality of the time consumed by devices is quantified. Certainly, there is always room for time to relax, play games, chat with friends and have fun, and for most kids, that is accomplished using their smartphone or tablet. But the excessive use of these devices is robbing our children of learning opportunities and connections with the non-virtual world around them.

Did you know that it takes kids three times longer to learn new material when they learn on a screen versus reading from a book and writing the information down on paper?

Recently, I asked a middle school teacher for his impression of the effect technology is having on his students. He shared that prior to the morning homeroom, all the kids are at their lockers with their heads down, staring at their phones.  He said it’s quite a compelling sight as kids get the last fix of their devices before they power down.  At the end of the day, they run to their lockers and immediately turn on their phones.  Some kids sneak phones into the classroom so they can play video games.

If a child is spending 6 ½ hours a day on screen time, the answer is 6 ½ fewer hours spent learning and growing.

Kids are not developing a strong sense of who they are, getting to know their strengths and their vulnerabilities. They never learn how to trust their inner judgment as to what is right and what is wrong.  And the result, they walk into a party and don’t know how to determine if the butterflies in their stomach are actually excitement or anxiety.  They haven’t developed an internal thermometer to determine if a situation is safe.  This is leading to an explosion of anxiety, depression, and the inability of kids to self-regulate. These are critical life skills for kids, and the opportunity to practice these skills and get good at them is being robbed by an excessive amount of time spent looking down at a device.

Parents must pay attention and take action.

Change is hard. We all rely on our devices for so many things. We tend to do many of the same things our kids do! Setting limits and establishing parameters for screen time is a great strategy for families to be more healthy, happy and productive.

Here are some strategies to get a better handle on the time your children spend on their devices:

  • Decide how many hours you want your child to spend on their devices per day and per week
  • Have family meetings – discuss the upcoming week, meals, activities and screen time limits
  • No screentime in the car. Encourage kids to play games that use observational skills
  • Have a firm cut off time – all electronics in the kitchen by a predetermined time
  • Don’t use your phone as an alarm clock!!! Shop for a fun alarm clock with you and your kids!
  • No devices at meals, adults included
  • At least once a week, sit down with your child and go over what they are doing on their electronics
  • When you give your child a smartphone and/or device, come up with a mutually agreed upon contract. The contract can be changed at any time based on the child’s age and/or ability to handle more responsibility
  • Turn off data on devices for a minimum of 1 hour every day to ensure that homework is done without interruption 

Take a deep breath, put your phone down and take a look at your kids. Don’t be scared or weakened by a screaming, sullen or upset child – you are the parent and YOU have the power to say no! It’s not too late to make these changes. I have faith that you can do it!  Remember the phone/devices are a privilege, not a RIGHT!

Now, go spend some time with your children away from technology and get to know each other!